Facebook suggested that I add her as a friend. Sent her a request. She accepted it. We now trade ‘Likes’.
She is my ‘Friend’.
We lost touch after our college days. My son found her son on Facebook. Soon enough we were trading tales of our lives after college. Our sons were busy trading ‘Likes’.
We are ‘Friends’. Our sons will get there soon.
I missed having friends like her. So I dug up all the photos I had with her. I made a collage and publicly told the world how much I miss her. I waited.
One hour later. I still had only ‘5’ likes and ‘1’ comment.
I made a better collage adding few more friends and tagged them too.
I missed having friends like her. So I dug up all the photos I had with her. I made a collage and mailed it to her. I waited.
Two days later a bigger collage was delivered to my place. By her.
The two of us sat across each other in the restaurant. After the customary ‘Check-in’ on Facebook, we realized that we had nothing to talk about. Our silence was compensated by the loud cheers and jeering of several old men in the adjoining table.
‘Uncivilized’ we said together and left. To a place that would add to the already existing silence between us.
The four of us huddled around a table in the restaurant. After the customary inquiries about each other’s families, we indulged in friendly banter and recounted tales of the past. Our jeering was compensated by the silence between the two young individuals in the adjoining table.
‘Friends or strangers?” we wondered and left. To a place where such questions didn’t exist.
A college romance brewed into a lifetime relationship. They were to be married in two months’ time. The best photographer was hired. Exotic locations were chosen.
Soon enough all their friends were requested to ‘SAVE THE DATE’ and treat this request as a personal one.
A college romance brewed into a lifetime relationship. They were to be married in two months’ time. A driver was hired. A good car was chosen.
Soon enough all their friends were graced by their unexpected visit inviting them to be a part of their wedding. It was not explicitly mentioned. But they saved the date and treated the invitation as a personal one.
Thousand friends and counting.
“How do you know him/her?”
The true friend who was inactive on Facebook sat silently disguised as an acquaintance.
“How do you know him/her?”
All the ten began wildly gesticulating to share their stories.
Ten tales with ten perspectives.
This could be your tale. This could be mine. However what it is, is a reality that we need to awaken to.
Yes. We need to re-evaluate our positions in people’s lives and vice versa. Are our relationships getting increasingly transactional in nature? Do we remember the existence of people only when we ‘need’ something? Has socializing eclipsed the true meaning of ‘friendship’ and ‘meaningful’ relationships?
I can hear your indignant voices dismissing this post. Well if you are indignant then I assume you are as guilty as I am. Of letting technology do the talking while your ‘raw’ emotions still lay buried deep down. Leaving you in a quandary of using the choicest of words on social media to garner the attention of the majority of people who don’t even matter to you in your life as opposed to the ones who really might.
Your misgivings towards a person end up in you not ‘liking’ or ‘following’ the person’s post on social media. Rather than resolving the issue, you resort to something like this.
A ‘like’ or a ‘comment’ or even the ‘react’ option is FREE. Nobody is paying you for it. It is like the white crayon in your color box which no one cares to use. So stop assuming that it could bear a significance on the other person’s actions let alone their emotions.
There is a difference between ‘friendship’ and ‘good company’. Not to say that the latter couldn’t graduate to friendship. Yet do think if good company would necessarily translate to a good emotional connect. Regularity of meeting people trapped in the same quagmire like you isn’t going to give you any meaningful relationships.It is an escape from a common problem that you all suffer from and a problem that you all are going to return to.So much so that you might end up resenting the person if he/she fights their way out of the problem.
It is socializing. Which is fine if you know what that means. Just ask yourself if these are the people you would reach out to first, when you have a problem.
It is something that occupies your weekends. Yet something that would mean nothing to you when you wake up on a Monday morning.
All of this is under the guise of ‘networking’. It is a great con job. A wonderful act of deception and self-deception. The guy who wishes you ‘Goodnight’ every night does so hoping that you don’t forget to text him the bus timings the next morning. The girl who added you on Facebook is on a ‘Liking’ spree only hoping that you would consider her for the upcoming role in your play.So on and so forth…
Our ‘networks’ have become so entangled now that we do not really know where our friends lie and where acquaintances lie. Much like where our ‘heart’ and ‘mind’ lie.
The world has become smaller. So have our hearts and even our brains.
Even if Facebook says I have 1411 friends.